K is for…

Key-Holes

LadiesWe all have our little secrets… little, silly things we don’t want Bruited Abroad… BatQuotela

Things that our Husbands, our Friends, and our Servants would never understand…

We close our doors and imagine we are Unobserved…

SecurePrivacyWe like to think that Really Nice People Do Not Peek At Key-Holes.

But, Ladies!  Think of your own actions!

Have you ever been tempted by the Allure of The Unknown?

Even if you have never Succumbed, never looked through that wicked little hole yourself…

You’ve wanted to.  Can you be sure that your Parlour-Maid is as restrained?  I think you shall find that you Cannot Be Certain, if you are quite honest with yourself.

RepineWe live in an Age of Wonders, Ladies!  Clever men are making cunning little devices constantly, to improve our Comfort and our Quality of Life.

Diverting Drapers, LLC, has invented such a Cunning Device- FOR YOU! DrapeKeyhole

Most Key-Holes cannot accommodate Drapes or Curtains.  But, in partnership with Sure-Lock Homes, LLC, we have made a Key-Hole that CAN!  Our Drapes are Attractive, and come in ever so many styles and colours; they are raised and lowered with a simple tug at a cord- and WE WILL INSTALL THEM FOR YOU with your purchase!

BatQuotewithBatLadies, Act Now! 

Keep your secrets Secret! 

Make your Privacy Inviolate! 

Send in for a FREE QUOTE!

 

Diverting Drapers, LLC: The Drapers of the Future!!!

Notes:  I can think of several Murderers who would have benefited from this device… that bat Costume is really VERY fetching; I wonder if my dress-maker… but no.  No, I really can’t ask her to make me such a Get-Up.  Not after the scene we had over the Men’s Walking Outfit.  She is SUCH a treasure, and I can’t have her refusing my custom.  Sigh…

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7 Comments

  1. I do enjoy being a bat- rather, hanging like one. I take it that’s not yet acceptable these days?

    • Melanie Atherton Allen

      It is Done, but Not In The Best Circles. You should start a trend, and make it Socially Acceptable. Have a Bat-Party, in which all the fine guests, in their fine finery, hang from the ceiling; you would have to figure out a system by which they could consume alcohol (perhaps a network of straws?) and mingle, but I have faith that you will come up with something. And if you have said party, Alec and I better be invited; we, too, yearn to be bats.

  2. Cute and clever. Enjoy the A to Z challenge. Maria from Delight Directed Living

  3. Keyhole drapes — how funny is that! And Sure-Lock Homes, LLC. The whole thing just cracked me up! 🙂

  4. My favourite blog so far. Really nice post, great to connect with another blogger through atoz. http://aimingforapublishingdeal.blogspot.co.uk/

  5. Keyhole drapes! Brilliant! Yet another Great Post. 🙂

  6. These are awesome posts. I’m dying laughing!
    History Sleuth – A to Z Challenge.

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